In order for relationships to work we have to be able to forgive the other person when they hurt us, however that is easier said than done and forgiving what other people do to us is not enough to make a relationship work. 

    It's much easier to forgive someone who hurts us if they do the following:

  1. The person acknowledges to us that they did an injustice or convinces us otherwise.
  2. The person apologizes.
  3. The person promises to try and avoid doing it again.
  4. If possible the person tries to undo the damage he or she has done.

  Once someone has done these things we need to let go of our anger and forgive them if we want our relationship to be a happy one.

    My fiancee and I have a method we call the Brand New Day method.  If one of us hurts the other we try and work it out before we go to sleep at night so that the next day we don't need to discuss it anymore and we can start out the day in a happy loving way.

   When we are wronged should we try and forgive the other person no matter what they did?  There are many who interpret Christian doctrine as saying that we should.  Yet the Christian nations of the world all have judicial systems that punish criminals.  If we don't forgive others the rage inside us may hurt us more than them.  On the other hand there may be times when it is best that one's righteous anger motivates one to bring justice.

 

c o p y r i g h t   ( c )   1 9 9 9 -2004 Karl Ericson Enterprises.  All rights reserved

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