Supposing John is annoyed at something his girlfriend said and criticizes her. She could respond by
Acknowledging what she said and explaining why and apologizing if it is appropriate to do so.
Denying she ever said what he claims she said.
Tell him she was kidding.
What do I mean by Freudian psychobabble? She could tell him that he is really talking to his ex-girlfriend and not to her or that he is venting his frustrations with his mother against her. If you really want to pour fuel on the fire when your boyfriend is trying to communicate with you try Freudian psychobabble. If you want to resolve a conflict take what your boyfriend is saying at face value.
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